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The Journey of Healing from the One to the Many and the Big World Beyond

on Sun, 02/17/2019 - 14:33

In response to a young mother who shared her recovery story in my circles, I wrote the following...and am sharing it here knowing we can all draw on one another's strength, wisdom and friendship.

Trust that many people love you and care about every aspect of your life, the struggles, the questions and confusion...the small choices about taking a moment to be grateful for a new day, a fresh start and way to respond to any conflict or need, any interchange that is difficult or challenging (whether an internal or external dialogue...we've all got 'voices in our head' about someone judging us..even if it's our former self--whether perfectionistic, lazy, hopeful, exhausted, not as whatever as we were or the next guy or gal...well you get the picture.

This Human Movie Our Lives are creating seems not of our own making. Yet having had an intro session to A Course In Miracles (and by the way #marianne2020 is about marianne.com running for POTUS) and hearing Einstein says that Nothing Exists (even the moon) unless we look at it and say it does... gives me pause for reflection. There's a story beneath the one we've heard in our lifetimes...about that nature of reality and the human spirit/ person and life itself.

Keeping the book open, the door ajar to allow new understandings to playfully sneak into our consciousness seems as important as chasing every molecule or thought into its category and classification. Okay, so here's to the healing and loving that is creating a wave of hope and growth among humanity in our dreams and when we are 'up walking around' (Not sure that's not the dream and when we are asleep is the reality by the way...).

High fives for not getting high (and yes, that means with the recreational marijuana since I do feel many people are going to find they have recreational paranoia, munchies, anger outbursts and then some and maybe drink more beer to go with the experience. Both of those substances are chemical depressants...and sooner or later, the imbalance (along with less sleep if that's part of partying or pattern, as may be a gateway to harder drugs...especially for younger people age 11 and up.

Even though the drug won't be sold legally to younger people, they likely will be exposed and even coaxed into using it by adults for various reasons.) Let's hope more people can consider the wisdom of not putting one's chemistry off balance. If there is a medical reason, that too could be carefully reviewed with meditation and herbal remedies, acupuncture and more, especially for younger working people. There are more resources online and talks in areas (such as one at Noble Horizons in Salisbury CT on 2-23-19 which likely will be covered in The Lakeville Journal.

An important letter in the 2-14-19 issue of The Lakeville Journal about the #HimToo movement by Deanna Barry from Womens Support Services of Sharon CT was helpful to realize 1 out of 6 men report being abused in their lifetime. Initially that #HimToo was about a mother's concern her son would be charged with being a sex offender in the #MeToo culture.

We all need to have a better understanding of the many ways a victim can feel pressured, particularly by someone s/he knows, may be 'groomed' in terms of having more trust built up and other social and physical barriers breached little by little, having a lack of support people to monitor and supervise them or go to and be believed and supported and much more.

Too often the social groups in which abuse occurs whether among friends or family members, tend to have many who will support or cover for a bully or sexual offender. Without mutual consent even among those in an established relationship can be violated. CT is speaking of allowing for marital rape statutes of limitation to be removed since the crime was not well understood or utilized within the existing time statute. NY has expanded their statute of limitation for minors to report abuse as adults.

The culture is starting to wake up and clarify expectations and put laws in place to insist on 'not letting things slide' when responsible adults are made aware of a situation (whether mandated reporters or those aware of the wrongdoing...especially at schools, in churches and in official community settings. The US House Resolution 72 is seeking to protect children from their own abusive parent as well, now that's real progress that could help 60K children a year in our country. We likely can agree that a parent abusing their child is horrendous since it is likely a cumulative life impacting experience. If that abuse includes sexual violations most feel extremely disheartened (the victims and any who hear or understand that is even a strong possibility.)

Somehow the people in charge seem to freeze or worse, have a hand in allowing it due to their social and likely economic ties to the offender or the agency, even those meant to protect children, that may have 'quotas to meet' and allow for slip-ups or worse even ship kids into situations (via foster and adoptions) where they are no longer tracked or held to the same standard.

That has historically been a major problem and cover up that the US public won't be reading in the papers anytime soon, yet I have heard as much from credible resources...and it truly is mind-blowing to consider the deep levels of corruption underpinning many of our systems. We need major groups of people to join in think-tanks to have a consistent presense in understanding the true ugly side of the history of US...and seek to make amends and stop the crime wave that is likely to consume many more people exponentially at every age and stage of life.

When we don't have that sense of shared protection and care, the stress and strain of staying well and keeping up with the economics of one's life is a perfect set-up to fall prey to the system...and its hungry wolves (again to meet quotas even if they are not the mastermind of the agenda...) Don't mean to ruin anyone's rose-colored glasses view of the world, but knowing is better than not knowing...and hopefully with more people looking at sites like No Lies Radio.org, CivicResearchInstitute.org (even to look at their offerings and summaries of important research and advocacy), CA Protective Parents Association.com, and even Steven Greer and Delores Cannon on youtube to consider the many ways we could see the world with new eyes and a shared understanding of options to stand in the truth or at least in the curiousity of what could be unfolding while we have time to act in this next decade.

So here's my response that I wrote to a friend in recovery...and here's to an inspiring, courageous rest of 2019 and beyond...

Very heartwarming to know you are doing so well..I didn't realize the many years of struggle, yet that is far more common than we really allow the people (or their families or friends) to share in meaningful ways.
 
I know of others who have found 'solid ground' much later in life and also pursued nursing (with success even taking their show on the road...not staying in one set job which I would think would be easier...that's maybe the Taurus in me.)
 
Sometimes a low Vit D or low iron level, high or low blood sugar or other bodily imbalance can be setting people up to look for drugs to balance their system...even pain meds of course are a huge problem.
 
In addition to those 'factors' there are early life experiences (ACEs study, I posted on my blog and have heard more about how being harmed or even experiencing domestic abuse--witnessing it and so on, or not having adequate nutrition in utero or early in life can factor into someone's imbalance...)
 
Then there's a host of mental imbalances (from caregivers and teachers, siblings or friends as well as one's own tapes and conditions...) that are having an impact on someone... None of which we look at carefully as though a medical health assessment...
 
People are trained to blame or dismiss themselves or other's symptoms..No one should feel they are 'to blame' for their 'choices'...I have often said our kids are more of who We really are and we are who are parents were... because the adults (parents, teachers etc) were making the big decisions... something to consider and again seek communal forgiveness, healing and wisdom from to benefit one and all in our amazing yet pressured modern times...

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Bonus options – Banking institutions want your business, so shop all over for possibilities to score a handful of further hundred bucks with your new account. If you can get $two hundred or $three hundred for starting direct deposit, that’s free funds to assist you to include some costs. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union

Credit unions are different from common banking institutions simply because they are certainly not-for-profit fiscal institutions which have been owned by their customers. Credit unions normally have reduced fees, bigger cost savings costs, and a more personalized banking expertise than a conventional financial institution. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant CU login

Blue Federal Credit Union Accelerated Price savings may very well be a good selection to suit your needs for anyone who is only going to place a small amount of cash in the price savings account. It won't come with any every month upkeep charges or least opening deposits. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union

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Of course, providing you're working with a dependable Corporation, credit unions are as Safe and sound as other mortgage loan lending solutions. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union

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Although this is not essentially a dealbreaker, quite a few lenders make it clear what their simple demands are so you will get an concept of how very likely you happen to be to get accredited with them. 

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What varieties of accounts and expert services do credit unions present? Chevron icon It signifies an expandable portion or menu, or from time to time past / subsequent navigation selections.

Should you transfer revenue to pay for a Invoice, you usually get it done from a examining account. Examining accounts are useful for everyday investing and typically feature checks and/or debit playing cards for making that straightforward.

Account icon An icon in The form of somebody's head and shoulders. It usually suggests a person profile.

It pays a reduced interest price over the financial savings account, so you could possibly possibly want to avoid wasting with the money marketplace account instead or consider a unique financial institution.

The ideal credit unions have lenient membership eligibility demands, so that you can be part of despite where you live in America. These institutions also jump out for their nominal financial institution costs, aggressive interest charges, and powerful buyer assist.

Founded in 1976, Bankrate has an extended history of helping people today make smart economic decisions. We’ve preserved this track record for over four a long time by demystifying the economical selection-generating approach and providing individuals assurance wherein steps to consider upcoming. Bankrate follows a rigid editorial coverage, so you can have faith in that we’re putting your passions to start with.

These might be a very good selection for those who may just be getting going with saving, or who haven't got a big emergency fund for unforeseen bills. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union log in

How can I locate the proper credit union for me? Chevron icon It indicates an expandable segment or menu, or sometimes preceding / subsequent navigation choices. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union

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Alliant Credit Union is an efficient in shape for people who don’t require a high personal loan amount of money and they are finishing a scaled-down dwelling venture. You are able to borrow approximately 85% of the personal loan-to-worth ratio using an Alliant HELOC. But it's essential to be willing to turn into a member from the credit union. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union log in

Of course, as long as you're working with a highly regarded Corporation, credit unions are as Protected as other mortgage lending alternatives. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union

Or else, you might not generate any additional funds. What’s more, you should make regular monthly deposits of at the very least $five hundred to qualify for an increased APY, over common accounts, on cash also to gain cashback benefits on many makes and vendors. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant CU login

Data provided on Forbes Advisor is for academic functions only. Your financial condition is unique along with the services we evaluation is probably not suitable for your instances.

The compensation we acquire from advertisers doesn't affect the recommendations or advice our editorial group presents in our articles or blog posts or in any other case impact any from the editorial information on Forbes Advisor. Although we work hard to provide precise and current details that we think you will find suitable, Forbes Advisor doesn't and can't ensure that any data offered is entire and would make no representations or warranties in link thereto, nor to your accuracy or applicability thereof. Here is a list of our companions who offer items that We have now affiliate links for.

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As you Review options for joint accounts, do your analysis to match features for reward money. Normally, you’ll need to perform some sort of qualifying activity to qualify like putting together a immediate deposit.

Forbes Advisor adheres to rigid editorial integrity expectations. To the top of our understanding, all content material is correct as of the day posted, even though presents contained herein may perhaps no longer be accessible.

The most beneficial 5-yr CDs will offer you decreased fees than one other phrases on our listing, but are still common choices for investors. These CDs are ideal for people trying to lock in significant rates for the long run.

Hence, this payment may effects where by and in what buy affiliate links surface within just marketing models. Although we strive to supply a wide range of services, CNET Cash won't include things like specifics of just about every money or credit service or product.

HELOC A HELOC is often a variable-rate line of credit that permits you to borrow resources for any established period of time and repay them afterwards.

Evelyn He is a Compliance and Operations Associate on the Personal Finance workforce to ensure material accuracy and editorial independence so visitors get up-to-date and objective financial tips.The compliance team's mission is to deliver visitors with reality-checked and current tales so they can make knowledgeable economical selections. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union log in

A lot of credit unions are area institutions, which means they may not have numerous branches or ATMs. If you know you'll travel a good deal, or if you need to financial institution in many states, you will need to check out In the event your credit union avoids ATM costs by partnering with free of charge ATM networks, delivers branches outside of your point out, or has an arrangement with other credit unions that might Enable you employ their branches to financial institution. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union

Charges and minimum amount stability requirements – Some banks charge hefty every month service fees should you fail to maintain a particular normal equilibrium inside the account. On the other hand, it’s quick in order to avoid these pesky prices by focusing your quest on free examining accounts. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union log in

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Most credit unions will list the requirements to affix on their own Internet site. You will also generally have the ability to apply for membership on the website, far too. In case you've checked the website and you're not absolutely sure if you qualify, or if you do not see a means to apply, you can often connect with the credit union or check out an area branch. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union

Courtney Johnston is usually a senior editor leading the CNET Revenue group. Captivated with economical literacy and inclusion, she has a decade of expertise being a freelance journalist masking coverage, monetary news, housing and investing.

Bethpage Federal Credit Union only requires $fifty to open a certificate, which is much less than what most establishments ask for. It also pays exceptional desire charges.

If you and your fellow account holder worth access to in-human being banking, the biggest financial institution inside the place is well worth a look. Furthermore, you could in all probability score a bonus for opening a whole new account.

" You'll need to fill in certain basic specifics of simply how much you plan to borrow, the place the home you might be buying or refinancing is located, and what array your credit score is in.

Young ones and Supplemental Financial savings accounts have similar options towards the Large-Level account. Alliant will donate the Preliminary $5 deposit to any Little ones Price savings account opened for youngsters ages twelve and more youthful. Every single account should be opened using an adult to be a joint account proprietor.

Accessibility on the Go Alliant is an internet credit union, so it's got a sturdy set of on the web and cellular banking applications for its customers. The credit union’s app is obtainable for iOS (receiving a rating of four.

We evaluation the ethics of every corporation in order to check if a selected financial establishment aligns along with your values. 

Deposit limitations and various limitations implement. Alliant’s Cell Verify Deposit Support is subject matter to eligibility. Some characteristics can be obtained for eligible customers and accounts only. There isn't a charge from Alliant to make use of the cell app, but message and details prices may well use.

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Whilst actual desire rates and fees will depend on the bank or credit union, generally, you'll be able to hope credit unions to offer improved charges and charge fewer costs than banking institutions. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union log in

Most banking companies compound desire day by day, which can help you get paid more cash in the long run. If it is vital to you personally To optimize your earnings, Then you certainly may choose a web-based financial institution about a credit union. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant CU login

Bankrate’s editorial workforce writes on behalf of YOU – the reader. Our purpose is usually to provide you with the most effective guidance that will help you make good personalized finance decisions. We observe rigorous suggestions making sure that our editorial information will not be influenced by advertisers. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant CU login

Alliant pays competitive fascination fees. But like most credit unions, it only compounds your fascination month-to-month. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union

CNET Cash is undoubtedly an promotion-supported publisher and comparison provider. We’re compensated in exchange for placement of sponsored products and services, or any time you click on particular back links posted on our web page. https://aliantcu.org/ - Alliant Credit Union

Information and facts supplied on Forbes Advisor is for academic reasons only. Your economic circumstance is unique and the products and services we evaluate will not be appropriate on your circumstances.

Alliant pays the $5 opening deposit and there aren't any regular monthly costs so long as you decide for electronic statements over paper, for which Alliant charges $one every month. The account requires a $100 equilibrium to gain a similar APY given that the Substantial-Level Price savings account.

Banking institutions are fighting for customer pounds right this moment, and those with cash to spare are well-positioned to take pleasure in a higher fee environment. With prices quickly switching, How are you going to come to feel confident that you're obtaining the best savings account or finest CD?

Due to the fact Alliant is usually a credit union, You'll have to become a member ahead of your home loan closing. Nevertheless, you needn't become a member to make an application for a mortgage loan.

Some banking companies also present useful spherical-up attributes to link the account having a discounts account to retail store funds for the future. If you’re married – or intending to make that important daily life selection in the future – that early effort and hard work to save lots of can lay the inspiration for prosperous dollars management.

We consulted banking and money planning industry experts to inform these picks and provide their suggestions on obtaining the best credit union for your needs. 

Ally has a fantastic checking account, but Alliant's is even more robust. Alliant enables you to deposit hard cash at any ATM in its no cost community, even though there is not any strategy to deposit cash with Ally. Alliant also refunds up to $twenty a month in out-of-network ATM costs, though Ally refunds around $10 regular.

Should your software is "conditionally approved," you’ll be questioned to provide the rest of the paperwork necessary to officially apply for the personal loan.

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