What are the odds I'd dash off toward Cornwall July 3rd on my way to Torrington, (my Mom's hometown where I shop and such) and stop in at a remote cafe 'just to cool down' and even to send healing thoughts to the immigrant children crossing the border and being held in Texas?
found a newsy flyer which I Happened to look at this morning at 10:40 am and see there was a July Fest there, something I'd taken my kids to in the past. Cornwall has lovely little gatherings on Memorial Day which include frog-jumping contests (with real frogs not kids leaping about, but yes, that kind of thing happens too..with hay bale mazes at the Ag Fair in the fall and even yours truly trying the Hay Bale Toss which was a barrel of fun as I recall.
They even have a field marked for gambling about which square a cow will poop in (technical language hopefully not too offensive, but hard to believe but maybe no stranger and a lot more natural than the Coney Island Hot Dog Eating Contest...who would like to see that be a quickest time for who can eat 5 or maybe 10 if we have to get a little Gross factor in there, Hotdogs?
But back to scenic Cornwall setting with little kids ready to run a mile (or a good part of it if under 7 with me who likes to run but not to tire myself out usually which is far too common for me with my extra 30 pounds.--that's not a put-down, just a put-on report.)
I used to race Kaelan's soccer team when they were about 9 years old only After they'd done their laps and only one length of the field on my call which usually caught them offguard. I'm usually a fair player, but with my age and such I thought this would level the competition a bit..and they'd taken me up on my challenge to race, I just didn't tell them the terms til they were pert near warn out...
With heavy rains for a day and dark skies, this day sadly reminded me of much of the season before and after Kaelan passed away when it poured for days at a time. I felt as did others that the heavens were crying along with us in our hearts for the loss of such a good kid, and aren't all kids good really, even if there are some behavioral challenges and such? The kids in these small towns are wonderful and reflections of their families and small town connections and schools.
No real thugs mixed in though if a few have strayed (and some have, even some I've asked to really try to live a life of honor to remember Kaelan rather than seek a tatoo or in addition to that if that was their real choice.) Still most hold out tons of hope for the youth of Their Community, realizing the connections and reflections of their joint efforts (no pun intended...but again hopefully ALL people could steer clear of drugs and alcohol which I count as a drul as well...to honor not only Kaelan's heroic sense of love and care for his friends in his life and in his final moments, but for the many thousands of kids and others who need people to be safe and sober, not apt to make poor choices and mistakes.
Nice moms helping their 8th graders serve grinders which ran the length of 6 foot tables and others pitching in made the morning a nice way to mark this Fourth of July., 2014...Five River Years since Kaelan's passing..while the Housatonic River and High School and Community keep thriving, the memory of Kaelan and others like him, who live fully and who touch our hearts earthside and heavenside can light out journeys and help us PLAN for Safety, Wellness, Peace and Friendship...
Does that have a nice ring to it as a good use of our freedom of choice, voice, and reasons to make some noise...maybe even a few ka-booms (which I playfully did with a new young friend who was waiting for his Mom to finish her online work at Mickey D's (McDonald's). We did some drumming 'thunder, lightning, pouring down rain' rhthyms, hitting the center of the plastic table for Thun-Der, and Light-ning, then the edge with R and L drum roll for 'pouring down rain' and repeating a bit faster.
He caught on quick and at age 6, I could see he'd be on his way to creating more music and ideas than I could keep up with. His mom invested $12k and got another $6k in help to do a Medical Coding program.
She's a single mom who could use some extra support, so let me know if you'd like to make a way to help folks like her..and of course her awesome fellow. That was a special way for me to feel I was connecting with kids the way I like to especially as a way to honor Kaelan's legacy....Some of the kids I saw in Cornwall I haven't seen in a few years, so their growth was a surprise to me, yet again I was reminded how quickly it all goes by.
Another young lady, now 27, is someone I cared for when she was 1 and 2..and though I haven't seen her much, I keep in touch with her Mom whose an amazing teacher of many decades and has touched many lives and literally coached thousands of kids. The one and the many means a lot when people are counting on each other to care for one another, help kids learn and grow and encourage them as they start their own independent or adult lives with support..
.That's one family, neighborhod, town, state and country at a time. It'd be nice to work on these bridge-building efforts..and as I felt inspired to write when reflecting on our Kaelan's humble human body drifting 7 miles down the Housatonic River from the Falls in Falls Village to the Covered Bridge in West Cornwall CT on June 23rd, 2009..."Life is a bridge we gently cross. Going over it, we all feel loss..but the gift of love is ours to give..in how we die and how we live."
On that note, we can venture into these new situations with hope, healing and greater love for ourselves and others and the greater good and divine as one may be open to that possibility..Exploring solutions and being aware that 'as we sow, so shall we reap..and that we may get as we give so to think very carefully of words, actions, thoughts or wishes or curses' that may seem 'fine or necessary' to dish out..If we can't take what we're puting out or consider it may happen to a different person--someone we love or even ourselves, well likely many folks would pause to reflect or maybe be very willing to have a 'second chance at not harming or hurting others or oneself'.
The mystery of 'everything being connected' may be playing out on more subtle levels, like some cosmic riddle that has a quintessentially Simple Answer..IF you don't want to hurt others or have what you are doing or saying be done to you..then Don't do it! Need to post before this gets lost as some parts get cut out when I'm not looking.. More to follow, peace out!
To reflect on loss and hope, on life and going through the open door, whether as a teen on a summer day in dangerous water or as a firefighter swallowed up on flames of hopefully something much more benign and natural as drifting off in one's dreams or at least having some idea that 'the end is near'.
One of the songs Kaelan had me listen to way Nickleback's "If today was your last day" on youtube...there were various times of reflecting on life and death..as a young boy, Kaelan believed in Jesus and when finding an arrowhead 10, 000 years old, he noted, this was here before Jesus was, Mom!
He showed our minister Terry thinking he would want to see something so special and old. When I asked Kaelan once how I could explain Easter to Sunday school kids, he said, "Easy, Mom. It's when the rock...moved!" He went on to explain that Jesus was no longer in the cave or the grave, but was alive and going to heaven! Not bad for a lad, my mom who appreciated rhymes might say.
Okay, I need to rest tonight and know the 'rock moving' may be a metaphor for the disclosures I've made about the years leading up to Kealan's passing...He was a real boy, and had many life experiences, and heard of more since he explained I did not filter too well what I'd tell my kids. I would assure them it was a lot more 'filtering' than my generation normally got. I told a friend that I had a knack for 'spreading the word' such as in 3rd grade (as I recall) I told the whole class one by one, or at least the girls, how babies were made. I had been told likely by some older girls, and felt 'it was just too important not to know!"
Well, this kind of reflecting on putting our common sense forward with some teams of support seems all the more important. The difficulties arise when facing 'legal, or real-life' consequences. Many AA or 12-step programs seem to think those can be 'forever waved' and yet laws are putting more people in the role of 'mandated reporters' and the internet makes everything instantaneous.
The overall plan could be one of Not Reporting what one doesn't have to, but letting perpetrators or criminals or even those with mental health or drug problems know they need to 'step down or do the next right thing' by not blaming, sharming or gaming their way into saving face and punishing others for their wrongdoing. It sounds complicated, but people make choices everyday to 'take a time out', have some 'down time' or volunteer appropriately or do something to right a wrong not even of their own doing.
Each generation seems to have similar 'deficiencies' because the laws to guide them more appropriately were not in place. Now bullying can be called to the floor and punished accordingly. People likely will feel they are losing to be free and a bit crazy at least in their own homes..they will be right, but held accountable by 'the law' nonetheless..
That's why it's key to learn Now what is really going on and try to Heal sooner rather than later to face the growing stresses of making a living, expressing a point, of agreeing to marry anybody without a clear exit option and to keep kids safe (again with recommendations from www.lundybancroft.com which basically means the kids would go with mom And the dad should support them accordingly, which is something entire towns could help promote..and Yes, good dads should be involved (and happily be accountable for the care they give with checks and buddy systems of women helping too).
Why not start in this way Voluntarily, along with mediation centers at every school with volunteer mediators (see The Promise of Mediation and other models too, and adaps in light of abuse or other laws).
There are options, but few take the time to learn about them and get support to use them effectively. Good luck and hope this is recieved in the spirit it is given..as a real 'message in a bottle' from a mom who taking her own dare to care and share as one can!
July 4, 2014 morning in Cornwall CT, Kaelan's 2nd home
What are the odds I'd dash off toward Cornwall July 3rd on my way to Torrington, (my Mom's hometown where I shop and such) and stop in at a remote cafe 'just to cool down' and even to send healing thoughts to the immigrant children crossing the border and being held in Texas?
found a newsy flyer which I Happened to look at this morning at 10:40 am and see there was a July Fest there, something I'd taken my kids to in the past. Cornwall has lovely little gatherings on Memorial Day which include frog-jumping contests (with real frogs not kids leaping about, but yes, that kind of thing happens too..with hay bale mazes at the Ag Fair in the fall and even yours truly trying the Hay Bale Toss which was a barrel of fun as I recall.
They even have a field marked for gambling about which square a cow will poop in (technical language hopefully not too offensive, but hard to believe but maybe no stranger and a lot more natural than the Coney Island Hot Dog Eating Contest...who would like to see that be a quickest time for who can eat 5 or maybe 10 if we have to get a little Gross factor in there, Hotdogs?
But back to scenic Cornwall setting with little kids ready to run a mile (or a good part of it if under 7 with me who likes to run but not to tire myself out usually which is far too common for me with my extra 30 pounds.--that's not a put-down, just a put-on report.)
I used to race Kaelan's soccer team when they were about 9 years old only After they'd done their laps and only one length of the field on my call which usually caught them offguard. I'm usually a fair player, but with my age and such I thought this would level the competition a bit..and they'd taken me up on my challenge to race, I just didn't tell them the terms til they were pert near warn out...
With heavy rains for a day and dark skies, this day sadly reminded me of much of the season before and after Kaelan passed away when it poured for days at a time. I felt as did others that the heavens were crying along with us in our hearts for the loss of such a good kid, and aren't all kids good really, even if there are some behavioral challenges and such? The kids in these small towns are wonderful and reflections of their families and small town connections and schools.
No real thugs mixed in though if a few have strayed (and some have, even some I've asked to really try to live a life of honor to remember Kaelan rather than seek a tatoo or in addition to that if that was their real choice.) Still most hold out tons of hope for the youth of Their Community, realizing the connections and reflections of their joint efforts (no pun intended...but again hopefully ALL people could steer clear of drugs and alcohol which I count as a drul as well...to honor not only Kaelan's heroic sense of love and care for his friends in his life and in his final moments, but for the many thousands of kids and others who need people to be safe and sober, not apt to make poor choices and mistakes.
Nice moms helping their 8th graders serve grinders which ran the length of 6 foot tables and others pitching in made the morning a nice way to mark this Fourth of July., 2014...Five River Years since Kaelan's passing..while the Housatonic River and High School and Community keep thriving, the memory of Kaelan and others like him, who live fully and who touch our hearts earthside and heavenside can light out journeys and help us PLAN for Safety, Wellness, Peace and Friendship...
Does that have a nice ring to it as a good use of our freedom of choice, voice, and reasons to make some noise...maybe even a few ka-booms (which I playfully did with a new young friend who was waiting for his Mom to finish her online work at Mickey D's (McDonald's). We did some drumming 'thunder, lightning, pouring down rain' rhthyms, hitting the center of the plastic table for Thun-Der, and Light-ning, then the edge with R and L drum roll for 'pouring down rain' and repeating a bit faster.
He caught on quick and at age 6, I could see he'd be on his way to creating more music and ideas than I could keep up with. His mom invested $12k and got another $6k in help to do a Medical Coding program.
She's a single mom who could use some extra support, so let me know if you'd like to make a way to help folks like her..and of course her awesome fellow. That was a special way for me to feel I was connecting with kids the way I like to especially as a way to honor Kaelan's legacy....Some of the kids I saw in Cornwall I haven't seen in a few years, so their growth was a surprise to me, yet again I was reminded how quickly it all goes by.
Another young lady, now 27, is someone I cared for when she was 1 and 2..and though I haven't seen her much, I keep in touch with her Mom whose an amazing teacher of many decades and has touched many lives and literally coached thousands of kids. The one and the many means a lot when people are counting on each other to care for one another, help kids learn and grow and encourage them as they start their own independent or adult lives with support..
.That's one family, neighborhod, town, state and country at a time. It'd be nice to work on these bridge-building efforts..and as I felt inspired to write when reflecting on our Kaelan's humble human body drifting 7 miles down the Housatonic River from the Falls in Falls Village to the Covered Bridge in West Cornwall CT on June 23rd, 2009..."Life is a bridge we gently cross. Going over it, we all feel loss..but the gift of love is ours to give..in how we die and how we live."
On that note, we can venture into these new situations with hope, healing and greater love for ourselves and others and the greater good and divine as one may be open to that possibility..Exploring solutions and being aware that 'as we sow, so shall we reap..and that we may get as we give so to think very carefully of words, actions, thoughts or wishes or curses' that may seem 'fine or necessary' to dish out..If we can't take what we're puting out or consider it may happen to a different person--someone we love or even ourselves, well likely many folks would pause to reflect or maybe be very willing to have a 'second chance at not harming or hurting others or oneself'.
The mystery of 'everything being connected' may be playing out on more subtle levels, like some cosmic riddle that has a quintessentially Simple Answer..IF you don't want to hurt others or have what you are doing or saying be done to you..then Don't do it! Need to post before this gets lost as some parts get cut out when I'm not looking.. More to follow, peace out!